My son is young and I have been out of his life probably for as long as he can remember. I would like to start contact again but I don’t even know where to start. Any tips on how to start or what to do?
I would recommend talking to a child psychologist to get some good insight. They be able to give you good pointers and reliable advice based upon your specific situation and your specific child – and should you ever need to go to court, that is a mature, responsible approach that will be on your side.
Past that, slow and easy. Write letters or cards, even if you live in the same city. Do supervised visitation for a while to make sure he feels completely comfortable with you before you ask for unsupervised time. Don’t expect miracles and try to remain humble and hopeful even if you have a tough day. 🙂 Get onto a schedule that he can depend upon. Be reliable. Don’t make promises you won’t keep and keep all of the promises you make.
If you’ve got pictures of him as a baby or even better, you and him, those could be good to show him. He probably does have SOME memory of you.. it’s just not shaped into ‘parent’. Telling him what you remember or showing him pictures can be a good way to reconnect what memories he has with you.