Last Updated on March 30, 2026 by Distance Parent
Virtual Visitation for Long-Distance Parents: How It Works and How to Get Started
Virtual visitation is a scheduled video contact between a long-distance parent and their child. It is a legally recognized component of long-distance parenting arrangements, a practical necessity for maintaining the parent-child relationship between in-person visits, and one of the most valuable tools in a long-distance parent’s toolkit.
Nothing in this article constitutes legal advice. For guidance specific to your situation, consult a qualified family law attorney.
What Is Virtual Visitation?
Virtual visitation is when a parent and child use video calling to spend time together, seeing and hearing each other in real time despite the distance between them. It goes well beyond a phone call. Parents and children can read books together, play games, work on projects, share meals, and engage in almost any activity that translates to a screen.
How Does Virtual Visitation Work Legally?
Virtual visitation needs to be included in your parenting plan to be enforceable. Many states now include it in long-distance parenting arrangements as a matter of course. Your parenting plan can specify the frequency, duration, and platform, as well as who is responsible for providing and paying for the necessary equipment and data plan. For a full breakdown of what to include, see Long Distance Parenting Visitation: Schedules, Travel, and What to Include in Your Plan.
Is Virtual Visitation a Substitute for In-Person Visitation?
No. Virtual visitation supplements in-person time; it does not replace it. A typical distance parenting arrangement includes extended in-person visits during summer, holiday, and school breaks, bringing annual parenting time to between 30 and 50 percent. Virtual visitation fills in the weeks and months between those visits, typically one to several times per week.
Who Uses Virtual Visitation?
Virtual visitation is used by long-distance parents, but also by grandparents, aunts, uncles, and any family member living apart from a child. It is increasingly recognized in legal contexts as a meaningful form of contact between a child and the people who love them.
How to Get Set Up
Getting set up is straightforward regardless of what device you are using. The most important thing is landing on a platform that works on both ends: your device and your child’s.
Current recommended platforms:
FaceTime works seamlessly between Apple devices and is built into every iPhone and iPad. Zoom works across all devices and platforms and requires no account to join a call. Google Meet is free, works in a browser without requiring any downloads, and is reliable across devices. WhatsApp video calling works well internationally and across device types. Facebook Messenger video is a good option if both parties already use Facebook.
The right choice depends on what devices you and your child are using. If you are both on Apple devices, FaceTime is the simplest. For everything else, Zoom or Google Meet are the most universally reliable options.
Using a computer:
Desktop computers typically need an external webcam with an integrated microphone. When shopping for one, look for solid reviews, reliable video quality, and a built-in microphone; there are good options available at a range of price points on Amazon. A headset with a microphone is a good alternative to built-in speakers for clearer audio.
Using a laptop, tablet, or phone:
Laptops, tablets, and phones all have cameras, microphones, and speakers built in. Any of the platforms listed above can be downloaded as an app or accessed through a browser. The portability of these devices means virtual visitation can happen from anywhere with a reliable wifi or data connection.
When parent and child are using different devices:
The only consideration when the parent and child are on different device types is ensuring both are using the same platform. Zoom and Google Meet work across all devices and are the most reliable cross-platform options.
Protecting Your Child During Virtual Visitation
If your child needs to be online for virtual visitation, child protection software adds an important layer of safety. Current well-regarded options include Net Nanny and Bark, both of which work across mobile and desktop devices and offer content filtering, screen time management, and activity monitoring. Device choice and carrier parental control features are also worth considering as part of your overall approach to keeping your child safe online.
No software replaces active supervision, particularly with younger children.
Common Questions About Virtual Visitation Rights
If virtual visitation is included in your court order, blocking it violates that order. There are specific steps you can take to document and address it.
No. Virtual visitation does not count toward parenting time percentages for child support calculations. Only in-person time with the child counts.
There is no universal answer; it depends on the child’s comfort with technology and attention span. Very young children typically need a supervising adult present on their end. As children get older, a dedicated device helps give them independence with calls.
I’d like to know how to protect your own computer’s privacy if the parties are not friendly. All it would take would be a kid pressing “accept this file” on a Skype chat while you were out of the room to give a hostile ex access to your PC and wireless network, especially if the person has some skill and could do some damage without it being easy to represent in court.
Good question! I think it’s important to put monitoring software of some sort on the computer. I use a piece of software that blocks any website that isn’t on an approved list and keeps him from chatting with an unknown person on skype.
Additionally, a good virus program will check all files as they are accessed or downloaded and quarantine them immediately if they are suspect no matter who it’s from… even a ‘known’ person.