Once upon a time, when we started this long distance parenting arrangement, there were very few products that offered voice and video chat. We used netmeeting in the very beginning, which was an old Windows app and to this day, we still call his internet visitation time ‘netmeeting’. My useless tidbits quota for the day has been met.

Then came skype. I’ve recommended skype over the years (and in fact, I’m grimacing at a stack of posts from over the years that need to be updated with this new recommendation). When skype came out, it was sleek, slick and THE way to do video and voice chat. However, since that time, a whole slew of popular chat programs have added voice and video, among them yahoo, google and aim.

We stuck with skype though because they started introducing voip products (internet telephone) and it was nice to give my son his own phone number and the ability to make phone calls from his computer so that he could talk directly with his dad and his dad’s family without me needing to be involved.

However, IMO, skype hasn’t kept up. I’ve used them not only for my son’s phone but also for my business phone and I’ve had pretty bad experiences with them in the last year or so. These are my personal experiences and your mileage may vary.

• We’ve had several unexplainable technical difficulties. Because we’re paying for the product, I expect

… (More)

In this post about virtual visitation, someone asked the question “how (do you) protect your own computer’s privacy if the parties are not friendly?” And the answer is ‘sensibly’.

ANY computer should be behind a firewall and be protected by virus scan. Additionally, any computer that a child has access to should also be protected by software meant to keep them away from people and content that are not deemed ‘safe’ by the child’s parents (parental control software).

I’ve used a few pieces of parental control software in the past with mixed results. Recently, I landed upon Norton Online Families. It’s parental control software that has a lightweight client that you install on your computer(s) but otherwise, you access it’s controls online from wherever you happen to be. It’s free. It’s robust. It’s feature rich. It’s great, I think!

Here are the things I like about it :

• It’s free. Completely, 100% free. No cost.
• I manage it online. That means that if I’m at work and remember to tweak a setting, I can do it right then instead of waiting. If my son is with a sitter and the sitter calls me to say they are locked out, I can change it from my smart phone. If I want to see what he’s been up to when I’m not AT HIS COMPUTER, I can log on and see it from anywhere.
• Also a benefit

… (More)

Rick Ortiz posted an interesting article about virtual visitation that I presume is by Richard Coffee. Unfortunately, between the two captcha systems, I couldn’t get my comment to post. So here is a response to the article.

You raise very legitimate points that I think every parent should consider when creating a long distance parenting plan. However, many, if not all, of these concerns can be addressed with proper planning prior to creating a parenting plan that includes virtual visitation.

Although abuse of long distance parenting plans may occur, there is no more risk of that than with any other parenting arrangement. Just like abuse or violations in the parenting agreement of a non-long distance situation, violations of a long distance parenting plan can and should be pursued through the courts. As someone who has taken care of such violations in court, I am quite certain that a parent’s rights to visitation, no matter the means, or not to be otherwise alienated from their child are respected by any judge.

Again, as a parent who has been on both sides of the long distance parenting relationship – that of the custodial and the non-custodial parent, I can personally attest to the fact that virtual visitation is a wonderful supplement to a long distance parenting relationship and that all of these concerns can be addressed in a well written parenting plan. That said, as you point out, it is not an adequate substitution to in-person parenting time.

“Technology is making it easier for noncustodial, divorced parents to maintain their bond with their children.

In virtual visitation, computers are outfitted with webcams that allow parents and children to see each other, making a phone call much more personal and much easier for younger children. ”

See the full story at ABC News.

Join me over at the virtual visitation email list to discuss virtual visitation, how to use it, and legalities surrounding it!

Click to join VirtualVisitation